Copyright 2007-2012.  Porn Addict Hubby. All rights reserved.
Relationship Rescue for Wives and Girlfriends of
Internet Pornography Addicts
This site is for informational purposes and is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.
Detachment With Love


What are the negative effects of not detaching?

If you are unable to detach from people, places or things, then you:

* Will have people, places or things which become over-dependent on you.

* Run the risk of being manipulated to do things for people, at places or with things which you do not really want
to do.

* Can become an obsessive "fix it" who needs to fix everything you perceive to be imperfect.

* Run the risk of performing tasks because of the intimidation you experience from people, places or things.

* Will most probably become powerless in the face of the demands of the people, places or things whom you have
given the power to control you.

* Will be blind to the reality that the people, places or things which control you are the uncontrollables and
unchangeables you need to let go of if you are to become a fully healthy, coping individual.

* Will be easily influenced by the perception of helplessness which these people, places or things project.

* Might become caught up with your idealistic need to make everything perfect for people, places or things
important to you even if it means your own life becomes unhealthy.

* Run the risk of becoming out of control of yourself and experience greater low self-esteem as a result.

* Will most probably put off making a decision and following through on it, if you rationally recognize your
relationship with a person, place or thing is unhealthy and the only recourse left is to get out of the relationship.

* Will be so driven by guilt and emotional dependence that the sickness in the relationship will worsen.

* Run the risk of losing your autonomy and independence and derive your value or worth solely from the unhealthy
relationship you continue in with the unhealthy person, place or thing.

How is detachment a control issue?