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Copyright 2007-2012. Porn Addict Hubby. All rights reserved.
| Relationship Rescue for Wives and Girlfriends of Internet Pornography Addicts |
This site is for informational purposes and is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling.
The above examples are cut from real life. Despite the negative consequences, sex addicts and pornography addicts will most often continue the compulsive behavior. Many defend their porn habits as innocent diversions. For them, they proclaim looking at images from time to time for sexual arousal does not impact their lives and personal relationships; they believe they can separate their online lives and activities. It is important to recognize that millions of men and women struggle with Internet porn addiction. The National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity estimates that 6-8% of Americans, 18 to 24 million people, are addicted to pornography. A full 70% of these folks reportedly have problems with online pornography. Wow. Very often the sex addiction is not the core problem. Many times there are deeper emotions and pain that users of pornography attempt to move away from. Treatment for addiction is twofold: the addict needs to identify ways to cease the unhealthy coping mechanism and to understand what their underlying emotional pain is. What are some common reasons for turning to porn? Addicts point to feelings of low self-esteem, work pressures, financial stresses, relationship issues, shame and isolation. Pornography can be very predictable and effective for short-term stress reduction. You always feel wanted. You never get rejected. You are always able to satisfy perfect partners. Internet centers in Iraq are always packed with soldiers masturbating to porn. They use it as a way to manage anxiety. ComScore Media Metrix, a company that measures Internet usage, reports that more than 70 % of men ages 18-34 visit a pornographic site in a typical month. It is estimated that 50% of the porn addicts under the age of 26 are female. This is estimated to be 25-30% of all online porn users. Men tend to surf for visual stimulation while women are drawn to interactive chat rooms. For a short time, they flirt with men online and feel sexy and wanted. They never have to face first date nerves, judgement or rejection when they are online. Porn addiction definitely has negative impacts: * A Nielson Online report in 2008 confirmed that 1/4 of all employees visit Internet porn during their 9 - 5 workday. People lose their jobs doing this, yet they continue to take that risk. * At least 35% of divorces filed in 2009 had some element of pornography use/overuse/infidelity in them. * It builds on one's insecurities and can stunt the ability form real, meaningful relationships. Interactive chat rooms and online reality games such as Second Life give the addict the ability to create an image that may look or act very differently from their real life persona. Turning to these forms of entertainment is easy, anonymous and always available. It makes it extremely difficult to wean away from. * There can be an obsessive compulsive angle to pornography addiction. For many men, porn use is the thrill of the hunt. This is why they spend many hours at it, risking their jobs and relationships with loved ones. They will lose sleep on a daily basis just to keep searching for the one image that will give them a sexually charged rush. The addict may begin to organize and catalogue their collection according to type and fetish. Doing so can give them a sense of calm and control. * Over time the addicted pornography user will require more mental stimulation in order to achieve a sexual high. 'Normal' porn no longer satisfies. Some men may turn to homosexual images, bestiality and pedophilia. It is estimated that 20% of all Internet porn features children. * The Internet is breeding a new generation of pornography addicts with distorted views of sex. It is incredible to think how many households do not have parental controls on them. Yesteryear, many a teen would come across a Playboy or Hustler magazine that would allow them to stare at a nude adult female. Now it is common for boys and girls to see live, and sometimes violent, sexual images at age eleven. Yes, age eleven. Your porn user may try to convince themselves that their online hobby is an innocent diversion. You know the toll it has already taken on their health and on your relationship with them. This is an addiction that is difficult to kick on one's own. PAH does not recommend an online counseling program for lasting results. The computer got them into this mess. They need to find an offline solution in order for it to really click. Consider looking for a counselor in your area, a man's purity group at a local church, or a book that will help them see how their decisions and actions are harming themselves and those that are close to them. |
A 45-year-old married patent attorney surfs Internet porn for many hours at home while ignoring his family. He ends up masturbating multiple times a day and has little interest in an intimate relationship with his own wife. The line between his online fantasies and his day-to-day responsibilities and life begin to blur. He is drawn to viewing pornography sites at work. He ignores the added potential risk of destroying his career. |
A 34-year-old married woman spends three to four hours a day in online chat rooms while her kids are at school and her husband is at work. deserves a dose of romance, flirting and intrigue. The instant messages and emails sent to a secret account sometimes lead to having cybersex. Once or twice she has met with her online pen pals at local motels for casual sex. |
spends his hours between classes collecting pornographic images that turn him on. He classifies and fills multiple hard drives. He goes out on dates with college girls but is just beginning to realize that his online habits have deadened his senses and he cannot become physically aroused with a date. His frustration and shame lead him to back to the computer time and time again. |
The husband of a couple married for fifteen years suggest they view adult movies together as a way to help spice up their love life. It sounds like a good idea in the beginning however, the wife begins to feel like a tool for masturbation as her husband never breaks his gaze from the XXX shots. She compares herself with the porn stars and feels ugly, rejected and used. She becomes clinically depressed. |
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