PAH has been holding back on discussing the whole Tiger Woods fiasco. Allegations of cheating and the subsequent string of
bimbettes angry at how Tiger mislead them in thinking they were the only mistress has been making your blood boil I am sure. But
there is a silver lining to all of this. The golf superstar has opened the dialogue for sex and porn addiction. This is a serious affliction
plaguing hundreds of thousands of relationships and frankly, the avenues for support and understanding have been lacking, especially
for the partner of the addict.
Now that Tiger Woods’ public apology and treatment are covered regularly on the news, the nationwide consciousness to your pain
has increased. You may be feeling a secret sigh of relief; you are not alone. And temporarily, you may feel a bit better about your
own situation. No matter what struggles you may have in your relationship currently, you most likely are not facing the plight of Elin
Nordegren with sixteen women confessing long term sexual relationships with her husband - a couple during the time she was with
child. Everyone's situation is different. Elin came from a divorced home and stated early on that she was very much against repeating
the same painful experience for her two adorable toddlers. And she reportedly has a hefty pre-nuptial agreement and 22 million
rea$on$ to stick with Tiger through the next few years of treatment. Regardless, imagine for a moment the LIVING HELL she is
facing:
The storyline is classic entitlement, delusion and betrayal. It also illustrates many of the common myths for both the partner and the
addict. Elin is intelligent, gorgeous and has two healthy, vibrant children. What guy would want anything more, right? The lesson is it
doesn't matter what you look like. The addict will be hooked on the thrill of conquest whether it is online, texting or in person that
drives him to more destructive behavior. Another lesson? Many believe that when caught, he will learn his lesson and clean up his act
the first time. Not true. One of Tiger's conquests was a waitress at Perkins. The 'flapjack floozy' was caught on film in an intimate
moment in Tiger's SUV in front of her trailer home by a photographer from the National Enquirer. Team Tiger quickly agreed to let
the golf great be featured on the cover of Men's Fitness (same ownership as National Enquirer) to keep the story from getting out.
Despite Tiger having to face his support staff and coworkers with this embarrassing tryst, he went on with his infidelity for two more
years and eleven more women. Only after he was outed on national news did he finally start making changes for the better.
He issued an apology to his wife and the public, took a break from golf, and on
February 5, he completed a month-long stint at the Gentle Path rehab program
at Pine Grove in Hattiesburg, Miss., and headed home to wife Elin and children
Sam, 2, and one year-old Charlie. Elin’s visit with her husband at Pine Grove has
won praise from the likes of Celebrity Rehab’s Dr. Drew Pinksy, who’s said that
Woods will need her support if he is to recover.
So how is the public perception of Tiger's progress? In a recent poll, 63% of
women believe sexual addiction is an excuse for infidelity. Women have a hard
time believing that sexual compulsion exists, because they haven't experienced
first hand the negative impact of it in their lives. You can bet that if women
found out their own husband or boyfriend were struggling with sex addiction,
they would label it differently. It’s a disconnected opinion.
Many women want to know what these sex treatment centers provide. First and
foremost, they take the addict away from the stimulus so they can concentrate
on healing. Addiction is a way for them to address a void in their lives. They try
to fill it with Internet porn, online chats, masturbation and one night stands: anything that will provide a dopamine-filled rush to the
brain. Beneath the surface, there could be family issues, mood or personality disorders, neurological conditions, sexual trauma or
chemical addiction. In Tiger's case it is said he has an addiction to Ambien and Vicodin. "In [sex] therapy, Tiger blamed a lot of his
cheating behavior on his drug addiction, saying that the drugs were responsible for impairing his judgment."
(PAH says, which came first, the chicken or the egg?)
In many cases, sex rehabilitation programs around the country treat sex addiction like any other addiction.
bimbettes angry at how Tiger mislead them in thinking they were the only mistress has been making your blood boil I am sure. But
there is a silver lining to all of this. The golf superstar has opened the dialogue for sex and porn addiction. This is a serious affliction
plaguing hundreds of thousands of relationships and frankly, the avenues for support and understanding have been lacking, especially
for the partner of the addict.
Now that Tiger Woods’ public apology and treatment are covered regularly on the news, the nationwide consciousness to your pain
has increased. You may be feeling a secret sigh of relief; you are not alone. And temporarily, you may feel a bit better about your
own situation. No matter what struggles you may have in your relationship currently, you most likely are not facing the plight of Elin
Nordegren with sixteen women confessing long term sexual relationships with her husband - a couple during the time she was with
child. Everyone's situation is different. Elin came from a divorced home and stated early on that she was very much against repeating
the same painful experience for her two adorable toddlers. And she reportedly has a hefty pre-nuptial agreement and 22 million
rea$on$ to stick with Tiger through the next few years of treatment. Regardless, imagine for a moment the LIVING HELL she is
facing:
- Paparazzi tracking and reporting her every move, even following her to her daughter's preschool
- Detailed descriptions of Tiger's various liaisons with the actual women coming out on TV to describe their pain and hurt when
finding out they were being cheated on with other mistresses (huh?!?) - Many of the text messages sent to the last mistress had emotional betrayal woven in "You are the only one I've loved"
- Many, if not most, of the interaction with the mistresses was done without protection; worries of infections and viruses for
the next couple of years will abound
The storyline is classic entitlement, delusion and betrayal. It also illustrates many of the common myths for both the partner and the
addict. Elin is intelligent, gorgeous and has two healthy, vibrant children. What guy would want anything more, right? The lesson is it
doesn't matter what you look like. The addict will be hooked on the thrill of conquest whether it is online, texting or in person that
drives him to more destructive behavior. Another lesson? Many believe that when caught, he will learn his lesson and clean up his act
the first time. Not true. One of Tiger's conquests was a waitress at Perkins. The 'flapjack floozy' was caught on film in an intimate
moment in Tiger's SUV in front of her trailer home by a photographer from the National Enquirer. Team Tiger quickly agreed to let
the golf great be featured on the cover of Men's Fitness (same ownership as National Enquirer) to keep the story from getting out.
Despite Tiger having to face his support staff and coworkers with this embarrassing tryst, he went on with his infidelity for two more
years and eleven more women. Only after he was outed on national news did he finally start making changes for the better.
He issued an apology to his wife and the public, took a break from golf, and on
February 5, he completed a month-long stint at the Gentle Path rehab program
at Pine Grove in Hattiesburg, Miss., and headed home to wife Elin and children
Sam, 2, and one year-old Charlie. Elin’s visit with her husband at Pine Grove has
won praise from the likes of Celebrity Rehab’s Dr. Drew Pinksy, who’s said that
Woods will need her support if he is to recover.
So how is the public perception of Tiger's progress? In a recent poll, 63% of
women believe sexual addiction is an excuse for infidelity. Women have a hard
time believing that sexual compulsion exists, because they haven't experienced
first hand the negative impact of it in their lives. You can bet that if women
found out their own husband or boyfriend were struggling with sex addiction,
they would label it differently. It’s a disconnected opinion.
Many women want to know what these sex treatment centers provide. First and
foremost, they take the addict away from the stimulus so they can concentrate
on healing. Addiction is a way for them to address a void in their lives. They try
to fill it with Internet porn, online chats, masturbation and one night stands: anything that will provide a dopamine-filled rush to the
brain. Beneath the surface, there could be family issues, mood or personality disorders, neurological conditions, sexual trauma or
chemical addiction. In Tiger's case it is said he has an addiction to Ambien and Vicodin. "In [sex] therapy, Tiger blamed a lot of his
cheating behavior on his drug addiction, saying that the drugs were responsible for impairing his judgment."
(PAH says, which came first, the chicken or the egg?)
In many cases, sex rehabilitation programs around the country treat sex addiction like any other addiction.
- Patients follow typical 12-step methods which prohibit them from any type of sexual stimulation for 90 days—the amount of
time it typically takes for brain chemicals to stop the cravings and for the body to undergo withdrawal, which can include
depression, body aches, and lack of motivation. - Just as an alcoholic is to never drink again, a sex addict is prohibited from any kind of self-gratification. Sex is to be an
emotional experience with a loving partner and not for pure sexual gratification. Patients are taught to connect with their
partners and to focus on sensuality, not sexuality.
- The downside? In these programs, the partners usually share in the blame. On some level, it is hard to ignore the signs that
your husband or boyfriend may be dabbling in infidelity - whether it is in person or online. Despite the shock and feelings of
intense betrayal, many women do not communicate their personal boundaries and do not insist on being treated with dignity
and respect in their relationships. To many men with porn-fogged thinking, saying nothing may be the same as silent
acceptance.
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Copyright 2007-2012. Porn Addict Hubby. All rights reserved.
| Relationship Rescue for Wives and Girlfriends of Internet Pornography Addicts |
| This site is for informational purposes and is not meant to be a substitute for professional counseling. |
Sex Addiction: Opening the Dialogue |
YOU DECIDE Elin was said to have been lonely, sad and depressed in the months leading up to Tiger's disclosure of rampant infidelity. Do you think she knew something was up besides Tiger being on the road a lot for golf? Do you agree with Elin's actions since she found out (chasing Tiger out of the home with a golf club)? Would you be able to forgive your husband or boyfriend for 16 trysts? |