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Relationship Rescue for Wives and Girlfriends of
Internet Pornography Addicts

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Unmasking The Porn Monster

In the PAH confidential survey of wives and girlfriends of men addicted to Internet pornography, a basic question was asked:

What is your personal view of pornography in general?

The PAH respondents were split about 50-50 with half having watched porn themselves on occasion. For those members, this article may contain few
surprises. For the women that have little if any exposure to pornography, this article may be very eye opening. You are on the PAH site so you already
know how regular overuse of porn can undermine marriages and relationships. But do you know how porn can change how your husband or boyfriend views
the world through 'pornified' glasses? At times it is difficult to read your spouse or partner:
withdrawn, angry, aggressive, combative. As you work together to salvage your relationship,
it may be helpful to get a clear idea of the content of today's pornography. How can you beat
this monster if you don't fully understand what porn promotes and why it is so damaging?
Although a picture is worth a thousand words, PAH will attempt to provide a brief primer on
the general themes and content existing in pornography today without use of actual imagery or
links to such sites. Our goal of PAH is to rescue relationships, not promote the porn industry!
Some of the material by default will be graphic in nature. If you have a weak stomach or do not
care for X-rated language, PAH will attempt to cull out the most vivid material so you can
choose not to read it and still get the gist of this article.

Last year at the Pornography and Pop Culture conference at Boston's Wheelock College,
academic researchers Robert Wosnitzer, Ana Bridges, and Michelle Chang presented Mapping
the Pornographic Text: Content Analysis Research of Popular Pornography. Their study
analyzed the 50 recent top selling porn films (DVD, VHS) selected from lists compiled by
Adult Video News, the leading trade journal of the porn industry. Their 71-minute presentation
is available on Google Video.

These most popular 50 films were comprised of 304 individual scenes. Within those 304 scenes,
a total of 3,376 acts of aggression were counted. That end up averaging an aggressive act every
minute and a half. Each scene on average contained eleven and a half acts of verbal or
physical aggression. This study defined aggression and violence as any action causing or
attempting to cause physical or psychological harm to oneself, to another person, animal or
inanimate object, intentionally or accidentally, whereby physical harm is understood as
assaulting another verbally and nonverbally.

Their findings for the best selling 50 porn titles:

Aggressive and violent pornography is the rule. It's not the exception.

In 95% of these 3,000 and some acts of aggression, the victim was either neutral, as in no change of facial expression or verbal expression, or was
sort of saying, 'That feels great. Keep doing it. Right on.' And in only 3% did we see some overt expression of displeasure or pain. Again, it seems to
be very important to the people who are watching this to believe that the recipient of aggression is fact enjoying it, is choosing it at some level.

In non-porn media, aggressors usually suffer consequences. In porn, aggressors do not have consequences.

Condoms were present in only 11% of the scenes. Commentary of 'Let's be safe' or 'Put on a condom' or something of that nature occurred in only
one scene out of the 304.

Certain sex acts much more prevalent in porn than in reality. A very large national survey of actual adult sex practices in 1994 was used as a
comparison. Female to male oral sex was grossly overrepresented in pornography compared to this 1994 national survey. Same with anal
penetration. In the survey, 1 to 2% of people were interested in anal sex but in 56% of the popular porn scenes we're seeing anal penetration being
shown. Female to female oral was shown in 23% of scenes, and less than 1% of women in the 1994 survey said that this was something they found
very appealing or did. What this demonstrates is that the desires and sexual practices of men are well represented, are overrepresented, and the
desires and sexual practices of women are grossly underrepresented.

Few porn scenes lack aggression. How many scenes didn't contain aggression? About 10%.

Name calling and insults are common in porn - they are in almost half of scenes.

Gagging and choking surprisingly common. 73% of the aggressors are men; women are the usual targets.

Slapping happened 30% of the time. Most of the aggressors in these films were men - 73%. By far the most common recipient of aggression was a
woman. Even when women were aggressing, they were generally aggressing other women.

Porn conditions men to be aggressive and expect that women will like it.

Porn films show 9 negative behaviors for every positive one. Less than 10% of the videos showed any kind of a positive act, and that included kissing,
caressing happened maybe twice. Something like a verbal compliment, 'Gosh, you look pretty', not, 'Slut bitch, come over here,' that happened
maybe five times in the 304 scenes.

Female-directed porn in the sample was little different from the rest. Of the popular films that were studied, less than 7% were directed by females .
They're not different. Not the bestselling popular ones. They're on the whole just as violent, just as aggressive. One difference noted consistently is
that they tend to show much more female to female aggression.

Pornography and Pop Culture

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